Benefits, Myths, and Risks of Self-Rehoming Pets - And why we shouldn't be so quick to discourage it.

Photo by Amy Mc

Historically, self-rehoming has been viewed as irresponsible and even dangerous, but times are changing, and today, it’s becoming part of the solution when done responsibly.

Historically, self-rehoming has been viewed as irresponsible and even dangerous, but times are changing: today, it’s part of the solution when done responsibly. 

In fact, you might be surprised to learn that the first question many shelters are asking when an owner reaches out to surrender their pet is whether they can keep the pet in their care while they look for a new home. (Okay, the first thing we ask is whether there is anything we can help them with that might enable them to keep their pet, but this might be the next best option.)

As an Intake Specialist at a municipal shelter, my goal is to help owners keep their pets out of the shelter if their situation allows. The truth is, if someone needs to rehome their pet, they’re likely going through a challenging time, so more often than not, self-rehoming won’t be a viable option. This is why shelters exist and should be used as intended. But when the circumstances align, shelters are educating owners about safe and responsible self-rehoming strategies, and it’s been a major game-changer: Every time an owner can keep their pet with them while searching for a new home, it opens a spot in a shelter for the next animal who inevitably comes in without that option. Not only are countless lives being saved, but animals are also bypassing the stressful shelter experience by remaining in the comfort of their homes during this transition.

But while the self-rehoming landscape is evolving, public perception hasn’t kept pace with the industry’s shift, and significant stigma persists. And, frankly, this poses its own dangers. Shaming people away from self-rehoming only leads to more animals entering an already overburdened system.

Don’t get me wrong. It makes sense that, based on everything we’ve heard about rehoming for decades, people who care deeply about animals are concerned that rehoming independently can put an animal in the wrong hands. And they’re right — if not done responsibly, it absolutely can. But until more is understood about how self-rehoming does — and doesn’t — work, I fear we are working against ourselves. To appreciate how, when done responsibly, self-rehoming actually helps animals, we need to better understand how shelters operate.

The solution isn’t as simple as bringing a pet to a “no-kill” shelter.

The reality is that shelters cannot handle the volume of animals that are coming through their doors. This inevitably leads to animals being euthanized because there simply isn’t enough space to care for every unhoused animal. Private animal welfare organizations (commonly known as “no-kill”) and municipal shelters (commonly known as “kill”) work together toward a common goal, but we need to appreciate how each operates and understand their limitations.

Privately funded organizations set their own admission criteria — think “public” versus “private” schools. They have the privilege of selecting the animals they accept into their programs and declining admission to those that do not meet a certain behavioral criterion or that they lack the resources or space to care for. So what “no-kill” really means is that they will never be the party responsible for euthanizing an animal because it would never enter their care to begin with. This is a reality, not a criticism. They are not picking and choosing to be petty — they have limited resources, and the need far exceeds what they can provide.

Municipal (commonly known as “kill”) shelters, on the other hand, are taxpayer-funded and therefore legally required to take in every animal from their jurisdiction, from strays to owner surrenders. They do not have the option to turn away animals, waitlist, or stagger intakes. Naturally, there will be times when animals are humanely euthanized because:

1. There is only so much space. A shelter that has 100 cages simply can’t house 150 animals.

2. There will be animals with medical or behavioral needs that exceed the shelter’s resources to care for.

3. Not all animals will be candidates for adoption (think public safety).

In practice, private and public organizations work together to place animals. Private organizations help municipal shelters manage space by transferring animals from the shelter to their organizations, where they often reside in foster homes until they are adopted. But they can only do so much. There simply isn’t an unlimited bank of foster homes or “no-kill” shelter real estate.

We need another option.

Shelters do not want to euthanize animals — what they want is to offer owners an alternative to dropping their pet off at the shelter, where they face an unknown fate. This is why the animal welfare industry is broadening the scope of where and how adoptions take place. By putting self-rehoming on the table, we introduce another option.

But here is where things get undermined…

When an owner vulnerably announces their need to rehome a pet, chaos quickly erupts, and the focus shifts from the post’s intent to find a new home to attacking the owner’s character for the mere act of rehoming. It has become a modern-day form of public humiliation. We need to understand that when we shame people, demand they bring their pet to a “no-kill” shelter, or assume they aren’t rehoming responsibly, though well-intentioned, we are actually making the problem worse. A lot worse — on many levels.

Working in Intake, I’ve seen the result of this one too many times: The owner is harassed into removing the post, and their pet is brought to an already overcrowded shelter. And all other people who might have been considering self-rehoming saw what happened and are scared off from trying it. This helps no one.

Don’t get me wrong, there is no shortage of irresponsible pet owners who show no emotion when giving up their pet and will give it away to the first person who will take it. If a post’s tone even hints that someone isn’t rehoming their pet ethically, we should 100% refer them to a shelter where they can surrender it responsibly. But we have to stop allowing that pocket of the population taint self-rehoming for the thousands of pet owners who aren’t taking this decision lightly and are committed to finding their pet’s next home responsibly.

Benefits of self-rehoming

YOU can screen more thoroughly than the average shelter (yes, you read that correctly).

After the fear of public humiliation, one of the most common barriers I face in getting owners on board with self-rehoming is their lack of confidence in their ability to screen applicants. They tell me they prefer to leave it to the “professionals.” But here’s the thing you need to know: Just as animal rescue organizations and municipal shelters vary in their admission processes, their screening processes vary as well.

Private organizations tend to be more selective not only in the animals they accept into their programs, but also in how they screen and ultimately choose the most suitable adopter. This may look like reviewing applications, interviewing applicants, conducting home visits, assessing lifestyle fit, conducting background checks, contacting references, reviewing the owner’s veterinary history, charging higher adoption fees, and whatever else they deem appropriate. Finding the ideal fit takes precedence over time spent in care.

Municipal shelters, on the other hand, typically have an “Open Adoption” philosophy, which removes barriers to adoption that people often face through private organizations. Here, adoptions are usually “first-come, first-served,” fees are typically low or no cost, and require only a photo ID and a clean record for animal-abuse charges. That’s it. Again, this is a reality, not a criticism. With hundreds of animals in their care, finding homes for more animals takes precedence. Remember, unlike private shelters, municipal shelters must accept every animal regardless of available space, so reducing time spent in the shelter benefits the overall shelter population.

These are broad overviews, and advantages and disadvantages exist in all practices. I highlight these differences not to judge, but to give you confidence that you know your pet best and that, when you take the lead, you can choose the adopter that best suits your pet’s needs.

Shelters can be stressful places! Self-rehoming keeps a pet in the comfort of their home.

Abruptly transitioning from a loving home to a shelter cage can be stressful. As such, an animal’s behavior in a shelter environment can differ significantly from its home disposition. This becomes even more of a concern if an animal is already anxious, fearful, short-tempered, prefers not to be around other animals, or has any other “fill-in-the-blank” personality trait. Animals entering a shelter with pre-existing vulnerabilities are more likely to exhibit behavioral decline, and that can hinder their adoptability. Foster homes are more equipped to manage special needs, but again, there is limited availability. For animals that do not do well in shelter settings and for which a private rescue placement is not an option, self-rehoming may be their best chance of adoption.

You’re not alone. There is support to rehome safely and responsibly

We have come a long way from Craigslist. Today, sophisticated processes have been developed to support safe and responsible self-rehoming. We also live in a time when we have access to a wide range of technologies to look into applicants’ backgrounds. According to the organization Humane World for Animals, “today, there is a growing understanding that nearly all adopters have good intentions (The Power of Supported Self Rehoming).”

Supported rehoming platforms like Home-to-Home and “Rehome” by Adopt-A-Pet have been major drivers of the self-rehoming movement. These sites allow owners to advertise their pets in a searchable database that potential adopters use to find adoptable animals in their area. Previously, such searches were limited to animals in shelters and rescue organizations — with this option, adopters can browse all adoptable animals in one place. These sites also offer support on all aspects of rehoming, including writing a bio, screening applicants, and transferring ownership. In addition to these platforms, many shelters are designating pages on their websites to feature adoptable animals in their communities. This is mutually beneficial, since those animals might otherwise be in their care.

If the process feels overwhelming, Rehome with Love is a full-service program that handles everything from creating your pet’s profile and advertising to communicating with and screening potential adopters. This is especially helpful for harder-to-place animals or for owners who do not have the time or feel uncomfortable taking on this process alone.

Additional rehoming resources are available on my website.

There is no guarantee of success. You can always change course if it doesn’t work.

I won’t sugarcoat it — self-rehoming is not easy, and there is no guarantee of success. Even when you put in 100%, you may not be able to find your pet’s next home within your available timeframe. The reality is that there are more animals in need of homes than there are available homes. Keep in mind that just because you are willing to try self-rehoming, it doesn’t mean you are obligated to stay the course indefinitely. This can look like setting a hard date by which your pet must be rehomed due to an external deadline, such as moving, or because circumstances have changed and keeping the pet is no longer a safe option for everyone involved. If, at any point, self-rehoming is no longer working, don’t hesitate to bring your pet to a shelter — remember, that is why they exist.

When is self-rehoming contraindicated?

Self-rehoming is a significant commitment, and I cannot stress enough that the circumstances must be right for it to be successful. As an owner, you need to be aware of your limitations and not take on more than you can safely or responsibly handle. These are some things to consider when evaluating if self-rehoming is a realistic option for you:

Are you willing to put in the time to screen candidates?

I’ll be honest- I don’t discuss self-rehoming with everyone. If I get the sense that someone is not taking it responsibly, I want them to surrender it to the shelter. Even humane euthanasia is kinder than an animal getting into the wrong hands.

Assess the quality of life for the pet and the human.

Is there something preventing you from properly caring for your pet? This might look like a lack of (or unsafe) housing, an inadequate food supply, or an animal suffering from a medical issue that needs more immediate care than you can provide. This could also look like a physical or mental health condition rendering you unable to meet your pet’s basic needs, resulting in unintentional neglect. Another factor to consider is whether a human’s health is at risk (e.g., severe allergies or a critically weakened immune system).

Is there a safety concern related to your pet’s behavior that makes it unsafe for you to continue living together?

If your pet poses a safety risk to humans or other animals in the home, continuing to live together may be unsafe. Personal safety needs to come first. While implementing management strategies at home can minimize triggers, the consequences of management failure must be weighed.

Can your pet be safely rehomed in a different environment?

If the reason for rehoming is a behavioral issue, it is important to assess whether a home better suited to your pet is available or whether the safety risk is too significant. There are times when behavioral euthanasia is the most humane option.

Sometimes, the fit in a particular home just isn’t right, and no matter how hard you try, nothing can change that. That same pet, however, may thrive in a household better suited to its needs and where its triggers are minimized (e.g., an adult-only home, no other pets, no children, etc.). When the issue can be solved by trading one environment for another, that is the best-case scenario. But the reality is that, while triggers can be better managed in certain environments, with thousands of animals in need, behavioral euthanasia occurs in cases where an animal would likely thrive in an alternative environment, but none are available.

I recommend consulting with a veterinary professional or behavior professional to help you assess your individual circumstances. My go-to is Kate LaSala (Rescued By Training), a multi-credentialed certified behavior consultant, who, among other services, specializes in rehoming and behavioral euthanasia consultations.

How can we respond differently to someone rehoming their pet?

For the reasons discussed earlier, I understand why people harbor anger toward those who rehome their pets. But living and breathing shelter intake, anger is the last emotion that comes up for me.

Heartbreak? Yes. Many times, I find myself wishing I were in a position to pay for the medical care an owner can’t afford. Or that I could find them affordable housing that allows their dog breed. Or that I could pay their security deposit so they can keep their cat. 

Relief? Yes. In cases where I suspect an animal isn’t being well cared for, either intentionally or unintentionally, I’m relieved that they are giving it up. I ask them how soon they can get it here.

If anger shows up anywhere, it’s toward the systemic barriers that prevent families from staying together. So, while this is likely an unpopular option, I have the utmost respect and gratitude toward the owners who are willing to take this on. It’s not easy, but they want to do what is in their pet’s best interest — not their own. It is much easier to drop a pet off at a shelter than take this on, so when I look at the hundreds of pets being independently rehomed in my 50-mile radius alone, it warms my heart. 

As loving as animal people are, it seems we sometimes forget to consider human welfare. We need to remember that the need to rehome a pet doesn’t necessarily mean it isn’t cared for or loved. Someone may be going through one of the worst times of their life and be forced to part with their beloved pet. The reality is, there are times when rehoming is the only option, and that is not for us to judge. We can’t shame someone into a different worldview or change their circumstances.

Imagine if we put that same passion that’s often put into tearing people down into being part of the solution? The most productive thing we can do is set aside our judgments and focus on helping both humans and animals. That might look like:

• Sharing their post.

• Asking if there is anything you can help with so that they can keep their pet (making them aware of pet food banks, veterinary financial assistance or clinics, offering to be a temporary foster, offering a complimentary training session if that’s your area of expertise — literally anything).

• Inquire about becoming a foster at your local shelter or rescue organization.

• Give them this essay so they know resources are out there to support them through this process.

• If you know someone looking to adopt, let them know to check out platforms that feature animals being rehomed by their owners, like Adopt-A-Pet, Home to Home, and Joyful Pets. Someone may be struggling to find a particular size or breed animal at their shelter, but it may have been there all along — I think this is the most well-kept secret in rescue, and I don’t know why.

  
  

For more insights on pet love and loss, please visit Pet Therapy Notes.

Related work:

Rehoming Pets: Beware of the Comments. We Need To Stop Bullying People Away From Seeking Help.

What Does “No-Kill” Shelter Really Mean? It’s not as simple as you might think.